All These Things I've Given
by PaigexPurgatory
Summary: Sam just came to check on him he didn't think he would ever know. He didn't know it would change his life again. Pre-series no slash R&R please? :
1. Chapter 1

**Hi yall! This is my first Fanfic so i hope you enjoy R&R please i need feed back **

**Disclaimer: do I have to say it… I don't own supernatural or any of the characters, ouch! there I said it are you happy! **

**Summary: Stanford era, what if it happened a year earlier? what if Dean didnt come to sam, Sam went to Dean? **

**Ages- Sam-21 Dean-25 **

* * *

><p>Sam Winchester sat in his apartment off campus watching the news, well not really watching just listening really. A name caught his attention.<p>

His mind raced "How? What? Dean?" he saw the picture and read the caption on the screen.

"FBI agent Dean Turner was admitted to the Cedar Sinai hospital in critical condition, he was rushed to surgery late last night, he was injured rescuing a little girl from her father who was had already murdered the rest of her family" For the rest of the article was found 2 pages later.

The article explained further about the young man's condition, the article only vaguely explained the actual case the Dean had been working on. But all Sam knew was that it was serious.

Sam sat staring at the picture of the brother he hadn't seen in 3 years. 'What am I supposed to do?' Sam thought to himself. He couldn't decide where to go from here, he could go to his brother but risk being pulled back into the life, or he could ignore what he had just read but know his brother would might die knowing Sam didn't care enough to come.

…..

1 Day previously

The screams echoed through the house as Dean busted down the front door. He sprinted up the stairs towards the little girls screams. "Please daddy? Go away!" begged the 7 year old girl he had met at the funeral for her brother just 2 days before.

A pissed of spirit had slowly been making its way through the neighborhood, possessing a parent, then killing of the rest of the family one by one before killing the host and moving on. It had happened 2 times before this, every 20 years. It turned out to be a local boy who years ago was killed by his father and hidden in the local park until the construction people found him 60 years ago. That is when the attacks had started. Before Dean could burn the remains he needed to save what was left of the Creek's family.

He burst into the room, not bothering to be quiet. He saw Mr. Creek's hovering close to the young girl twirling a streak knife in his fingers. The loud crashing sound made Mr. Creeks jolt up to look at the intruder. Dean shoots, without thinking about the large man who was getting ready to pounce. "Shit!" Dean yells forgetting that it wasn't a ghost, it was a person. The man falls to the ground gasping. Dean doesn't wait for the ghost to regain it strength and attack. He grabs the girl huddled in the corner and runs.

He is about to reach the door when and invisible force throws him to the ground. He releases the girl and yells to her directions to leave the house quickly and not to worry that everything will be ok.

Over the past few days he had spent at the house trying to figure out which parent was possessed he had grown rather fond of the girl. She had a similar mentality, protect your little brother; of course all she had to protect him from was the sand box bully but all the same, they both had taken it upon themselves to do so and when their sibling was hurt they always blamed themselves whether it was their fault or not. Her brother had been killed 4 days before he had arrived and he had immediately connected with the young child's pain.

The door slammed behind the girl. Dean was dragged back down the hall by the force, he was unprotected, he had lost his gun in the fall and it was too far out of reach by now. Mr. Creeks stud above him now with a viscous look on his face. He was bleeding from the where the rock salt had hit him. He wouldn't die it wasn't too bad.

The man took it upon himself to bring out another knife this time a little bigger. "your just a bucket of fun aren't you chuckles" Dean sarcastically to the possessed man. But the man said nothing he simply took out the knife and began to tear through Deans clothing before getting to the skin. Once the skin was visible he began to poke and prod at Dean's torso.

What seemed like days to the hunter was actually about 5 hours of pure torture. The spirit stabbed and cut deep into his flesh. Dean was losing the battle with unconsciousness and passed out from blood loss.

….

Sam had spent the next hour and a half contemplating this decision. He thought about the pros and cons, it didn't help. He wished he could ask Jess but she didn't know the whole story, she couldn't possibly understand.

If he didn't go he knew he would feel guilty, Dean would have come, anytime and place, his big brother would be there. But on the other hand he finally got out, he was normal, I mean dean had been in the hospital before, he was always fine right? He told himself that over and over again trying to convince himself. But you saw that article it doesn't sound like a concussion or broken bones this time, it was serious not something even Dean could shrug off.

'What's the harm in checking on him right? He doesn't even have to know your there just for your own sanity check to see if he will be ok.' That was it he was going he packed his bag with a few small things.

On his way out Jess stopped him. "Are you ok Sam?" she asked obviously worried "I saw the newspaper on the floor and your carrying a bag with you. Are you going somewhere?"

"Yea kind of I'll be back in 2 days I promise." Sam said hurriedly as he tried to hide the contense of his bag from her. He left giving her a long kiss.

"Are you sure your all right?" she yells in bewilderment at the briskly moving figure.

Sam reached his small rental car and loaded the gear in without another word. "Here we go" he says to himself. In no way did he hate Dean, it was his father he hated, but Dean was apart of the life he left behind. Coming back into contact with his brother was nerve racking. But either way he was going to save his brother whether he knows it or not. Dean saves lives, he needs to be saved. He couldn't help but wonder why his father wasn't there to help. 'Doesn't matter' With that he pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the hospital.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Sam arrived at Cedar Sinai hospital 5 hours later. He sat in the parking lot going over his plan in his head. 'Go in, ask where dean's room was, if they ask say you're a friend from the station like old times, find and check on dean, and leave he doesn't have to know'. He went over every scenario, when he was confident that he would get out unscathed he finally exited the pickup truck.

The halls were full of bustling doctors and nurses. Sam approached the reception desk. The woman behind the desk was busy scrambling about while looking through the files. Sam waited for her to notice him for a minute or two but soon became impatient. He tapped the bell three times before she looked up. 'How can I help you?" she spoke softly.

"Yes, I'm looking for Dean Win- Turner. He was brought in last night." Sam was starting to revert to his old self, letting the supernatural information he had acquired cloud his judgment. "Common I need to see him now!"

The nurse was startled by such a frantic outburst. "He is in room…." She cut off as she looked through the file. "You can see him soon"

"No, why aren't you telling me, is there something I should know?" Sam was shaking with a mixture of anger and fear.

The poor women looked tormented by the word she was about to speak "I'm sorry sir but it's pretty bad I'm afraid they are pretty confident that he won't make it, I'm sorry they are trying but-" Sam's face became deathly white, his head swam and on the verge of passing out. "Are you alright sir?" the women sounded even more worried than before.

"No, actually I'm not, I just found out my brother is dying and the even the doctors have given up!" Sam gulped in air trying to calm himself down "No what the kicker is? While he was dying I was at school like a good little boy, Dammit I am the worst fucking brother in the world!" Sam vision swam and as he tried he stumbled and fell into a nearby chair. The nurse could hear him cursing himself for being a bad brother.

…...

It was 4 hours later that Sam was allowed to see his brother; he had just been dismissed from surgery. Sam couldn't help but gasp at the form on the bed. Dean didn't look like the strong joking brother he remembered. "Dean?" he asked in a whisper as if talking at a normal level would cause him more harm. "Oh god, common Dean, wake up, like before, you've never kept me waiting this long." Dean twitched in his heavily medicated sleep.

It was several hours before Dean's eyes fluttered open. Sam jumped to his feet and ran across the room to meet his brother. It was only a few minutes of confused stares and silence until Dean fell back to sleep. This would happen 4 more times before he was coherent. His eyes slowly lifted from the tubes and wires he was strapped to and sees his brother's form in the window. "Sammy?"

Sam jolts around relief plastered all over his face. "Thank god, you scared me man" When he sees the heart broken look flash across his brother's face he knows something is wrong "What's wrong man?" there is clearly confusion in his brothers eyes.

"You sick bastard" Dean states complete seriousness in his face "either I'm on a crap load of pain killers and I'm hallucinating or you think your so clever pulling the Sam card, well been there, done that, I long since given up hope on him." Dean's words stung, had he really been that wrong in leaving. What had he done to his family.

"Dean I'm so sorry, I swear I didn't mean it, I could have saved you I'm so sorry" Sam choked back the hot tears that were welling up in his eyes. "But it's me, it's really me"

"Nice try bitch, but I'm not buying it" The anger and pain his brother was feel seemed to radiate through the room. At the look on his brother's face he felt a twang of urgency, 'what if it really is?' dean thought to himself. "Prove it what was the last thing I said to you before you left for college?"

Sam remembered that day vividly. "You said nothing to me, you didn't talk to me, you let dad win" Sam remembered those old times with his father and brother.

"Shit I'm sorry Sammy, I knew I should have let Caleb take this hunt" Dean was actually looked pissed knowing Sam was here. Sam was too shocked to speak; he didn't think Dean would act that way towards him, at least thankful or happy to see him. But then of course before the he heard how bad it was he had thought he Dean wouldn't even know.

"Why are you sorry? This isn't your fault."

"No, I'm sorry you're here, I didn't want you to know, didn't want you to come" Dean almost begged this time. "I'm sorry" there was silence after that. Dean soon fell asleep in the bed while Sam sat at his bed side contemplating what had just happened. 'Was dean really that broken?' Sam thought to himself desperately.

….

"He isn't doing well his brain is swelling by the time we found him all the wounds were severely infected. We can't really help him, he isn't responding anymore, we don't understand." The Doctor tried to explain to Sam. It was well past the day he had set to leave but he didn't care, he was too wrapped up researching all the possible cures. "He has severe pneumonia. And the contusions are deep."

Dean had been in a medically induced coma. His internal bleeding wouldn't stop and the infections were spreading despite the antibiotics. Dean hadn't spoken to him much before then anyways, but when he did speak it was to tell him to go back to school and leave him before it's too late. Obviously he argued saying I'm not gonna let you die, and that he has to make sure he didn't get into any more trouble.

Sam turned to leave, but as her reached Deans room a beeping sound arose from the monitor. "Help!" yells Sam down the hall. Seconds later doctors were swarming Dean's body. But the beeping isn't stopping, and Sam sees the crash cart come forward and he can see through his teary eyes and sees them shocking him over and over and nothing is working, nothing is helping.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello readers, **

**i'm so excited i have readers by the way so thank you to you all. R&R please? enjoy :) **

* * *

><p>Chapter 3<p>

What seemed like forever was actually 5 minutes until Dean was breathing. Sam let out the breathe he hadn't realized he was holding and wiped away his tears. Stayed by his brother's side like he had done in the past, only taking his eyes off him to go to the bathroom 15 feet away.

He stayed with him for 3 days without a break. He hadn't slept in longer, the doctors threatened to sedate him if he didn't get some rest. Sam was in a foul mood since he had gotten to the hospital and simply gave him a threatening glare that said 'don't even try'. He was to scared that if he left that Dean would be gone when he got back.

He waited and begged and yelled at the doctors every time they reminded him of Dean's condition. He couldn't ;listen to it anymore he needed Dean, even when he had pushed him out of his life, he influenced all his decisions, he was the only reason he had kept hunting for that long, he was the reason he had been able to handle his guilt in leaving. If dean was out there people would be safe, people wouldn't need him but Sam never thought that dean might need him until he saw his brother's form lying on the hospital bed, with tubes and wires keeping him alive. He had never, _never _,he been this hurt.

Sam was pulled from his thoughts by the ringing from his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at the name on the screen. It was the only name that could pull him away from his brother, Jess. Sam left the room, quickly as he answered. He couldn't concentrate with all the beeping coming off the machines. "Oh hey Jess." His voice cracked from all the yelling he had done earlier.

"Sam thank god, I've been trying to get you on the phone for days" Jess's voice had a mix of annoyance and relief.

Sam signed, he knew he had to tell her something, he couldn't lie about even 1 more thing to her, "yea.. uh.. sorry about that it was kinda an… emergency"

"Are you ok? You don't sound like yourself, and don't say fine you clearly are not."

"Your right I'm not ok" his voice cracked again, this time it was because of the sadness that enveloped him at the idea of confiding in someone else. "it… it's my brother, you know I told you we didn't get along… I lied.. but that's no important right now" Sam had to stop for a second so he could suppress the lump forming in his throat.

"Sam, tell he what's wrong? Please your scaring me." Jess sounded concerned.

"He was in an…accident the doctors don't think he will make it… but they don't know everything, right? He has always been fine before now, this time w-won't be any different." Same had given up on holding back, sobs now racked his body.

He could see Dean's body inside the room. He needed to get away for a minute. He stumbled down the hall, he met the doctor in the hall. He ignored the phone just for long enough to ask what he as doing. He said he needed to walk dean up just for a minute, awake him from the medical coma in order to give him a new drug he thought it was promising new technology and there is a greater chance that he will wake up now.

Sam just continued stumbling down the hall. The doctors had said this every time before this and nothing had worked. He looked down at the phone in his hand realizing Jess was still waiting. "He'll be ok, I just know it" he sobbed onto the phone.

Jess consoled the heartbroken man "everything would be ok, it will work out, like you said it always has been in the past, what makes this time any different?" Jess was concerned and would ask questions later, questions like 'why in the past? What kinda life did he live that he has been in the hospital in a similar situation? Why did he lie about no getting along with him?' so many questions flooded her head.

Sam and jess talked for 15 minutes. While Sam sat in the waiting room. He could see down the hall. A loud beeping started emanating from hallway. Sam dropped the phone from his ear and held it at his side as he raced down hall.

As Sam skidded into the room he felt his heart plunge into his stomach. The doctors swarmed his brother again. Within the next few seconds they had people restraining Sam from reaching Dean. He and Dean hadn't talked much but that connection was just as strong as it had been before he left.

The phone had clattered to the ground. But Jess was still on the other end forced to listen to Sam's cries and screams for his brother. She was crying now to hearing all that pain coming from Sam. "Dean! Dean please common please!" Sam begged.

The doctors stepped away trying to figure out how to calm down the convulsing Dean. The nurses restraint is loosened a s he yells to the nurses around the table, "I can help, he will listen to me, I can help you please?" Sam runs to the table and holds his brothers shoulders to the table. "calm down, calm down, they can help!"

Dean looked at his brother "love you S'my" he says through clenched teeth. With those last words he went still, eyes wide open and face etched with regret.

Sam just sat there crying and holding his brother to his shaking chest. "Nonono please..? common we are still brothers, I shouldn't have left please I'm sorry I'll come back if you do. Please? I-I still need you. Please?" He pleads and sobs on deans exposed chest. He could see the shape the burn marks from the paddles.

The doctors explained he had a bad reaction when he was woken up. His body couldn't take another medication so it shut down. "I'm sorry sir"

* * *

><p><strong>I have finals this coming week so it may take me a little longer to update than normal, i'm sorry. But Reviews are welcomed always :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you to Fraidy cat for catchin my error and to all who reviewed in the past, please review this time to please?

Sam lay in between the motel sheets, eyes wide open. He had been like that for days. But today was it, after today his eyes would never be graced with dean's presents. He had already gone through the initial denial.

He put on his black suit and unconsciously smoothed his tie while he looked in the mirror. Anyone could tell he had passed breaking point long ago. Sam's eyes were still red and blotchy; he had given up restraining his tears.

The funeral was small just Sam and a couple of other hunters who were in the area and had heard of the badass dean Winchester. Sam cried shamelessly, he didn't care what the other hunters thought. He had just gotten him back, and now he was gone. Dean his protector, his brother, his friend, his improvised father, his entire life was gone, gone because he was selfish and left, knowing full well what could and probably would happen while he was gone.

Sam wept as he watched the coffin go so cruelly into the ground. He knew he should have cremated Dean, but the idea of sending his savior into heaven or hell, or wherever he was going, by fire didn't seem fitting. It wasn't right.

He had surpassed denial days before. Now he was stuck in the guilt, and pain. It had been his fault, all his fault. Sam whispered to the grave when he was alone "I'm sorry, I really am, if I hadn't left you wouldn't have gone alone and you would be here, I would give anything to have you back."

It was weeks later, he hadn't talked to Jess since the hospital, and he was still numb. Felt nothing but a dull reoccurring pain in his gut.

He looked for anything, anything to bring him back, but there was nothing. Hunting was all he had. Killing anything and everything. He didn't care anymore. Sam read in the news paper of a fire off campus, in his old apartment where Jessica Moore had died. It only pushed him further into the hole he had dug himself.

He didn't attend jess's funeral, he was too far gone, consumed by his self-loathing. He wanted and needed to get revenge, if nothing else. Whatever got in his way, anything that was less than human with less than human intensions. The young hunter was more broken than he cared to admit.

Bobby Singer was even now on his way to Sam. He had already stopped by Dean's grave; Bobby was lost for words, the boy who seemed so indestructible was gone, it hurt like he lost his own son. Dean was always the perfect hunter, whatever had caused his demise was definitely more personal than he had let Sam know.

He wished he was at the funeral, but he was on a particularly long, dangerous hunt with Caleb and Pastor Jim. Sam had called late at night while he was stitching up the long gash along Caleb's back. Bobby had only answered when he saw Dean's name on the screen. Bobby remembered it word for word,

"_Hello?" Sam's voice echoes into the phone. Bobby was surprised to hear Sam's voice instead of Dean's. _

"_Sam? Is that you boy, it's good to hear from you and all, but why are you calling me on Dean's phone?"_

_Sam didn't speak right away, then he cleared his throat "…that's why I'm calling Bobby….it's a… Dean he… he-"_

_Bobby cut him off "Is dean alright? What happened? Where are you?" he knew it must have been bad if Sam was there, after all the trouble he had caused them in leaving, coming back was something bobby hadn't expected ever to happen. _

_ Sam's voice was cracking, and bobby could feel a lump forming in this throat "Dean… he just, he just didn't make it" _

"_Didn't make it? What do you mean?" Bobby could hid the panic from his voice or his face apparently, because Caleb looked up and Pastor Jim stood from his chair in the corner, both of their faces looked worried. _

"_I just don't know bobby, all I know is that Dean is dead and I can't do anything" _

"_What? Wait, how did this happen? and why are you there?" Bobby heart plummeted into his stomach. _

"_he was on a hunt close to Stanford, and I saw his picture on the news broadcast. He was working on a hunt and I got here as quick as I could, and…and I was here for a few days just to check on him, and he just gave in, something about reaction to medicine or something…." Sam hopelessness radiated through the phone "…I don't know what to do anymore, we buried him today I would have called sooner but-"_

"_it's ok Sam, I'll be there as soon as I can"_

Bobby's heart ached just thinking about it, poor Sam he must have blamed himself for everything. Bobby arrived an hour later still not done sorting through his thoughts about the resent death, but who knows if he ever would be done.

He knocked on the motel room door, Sam looked through the peep hole before whipping it open to see bobby standing in the doorway.

Bobby could see that Sam was in bad shape, he wasn't like Dean in that way, he could never except the reality of death in their line of work. Dean always understood that saving lives like they did came with a price, getting arrested, people thinking they were crazy, running from the cops, stealing, credit card scams, and the constant threat of death. Death had always followed the Winchesters more than any other people Bobby knew. But at the same time they were the strongest family despite their dark past, but only when they were together, also a weakness together because if one of the three strings were pulled the entire family fell to pieces. It had happened when Mary died, but the boys were too young to leave, so John had time to put it together the only way he knew how, with revenge. But when Sam left, John was too deep to come back and pick up the pieces, it had been that way for years. Dean had always picked up the pieces, not that time however. It wasn't long after Sam left that Dean himself had a falling out with his father.

Sam invited his old friend inside. Bobby listened to the whole story, waiting patiently for his turn to speak. It finally came "Sam I think Dean may have hidden something from you, it doesn't make since, he is too good to fuck up on a simple salt and burn… something was-" he cursed at himself in his head for saying that "something is up?"


	5. Chapter 5

Bonus Chapter!

It's really short but something to tide you over for a day or 2

"What do you mean something is up? Dean wasn't acting weird, he would never hide anything from me."

"Sam, the only 2 reason I can think of that would cause Dean to lie are to protect you or because he was doing something he shouldn't have been"

"No, he just made a mistake, Dammit bobby he would never" Sam's voice was beginning to quiver.

"I hate to say it Sam, but you haven't been around for a while… Deans changed a lot since you left, like more than just a little urge to hunt"

"More than an urge to hunt?" Sam questioned

"He has been really reckless, almost suicidal like he didn't care as long as he was hunting nothing mattered but killing."

"he's never minded killing evil but if he was in trouble he would play it smart." Sam was getting annoyed at bobby's accusations.

"Like a said a lot has changed. Your leavin' had a big impact on Dean"

"That doesn't mean he was hiding something, he would have told me" Sam stated stiffly. The conversation lapsed for a few minutes. "We still need to find out what went on"

Sam's numbness steadily lessened while getting back to his roots, hunting roots were deep seeded in him whether he liked to admit it or not. Bobby and Sam went through all of Deans belongings, the motel room held no answers. The car however was a different story. The impala used to be more of a home to the Winchesters than any other place ever was. But the real mystery was what Sam found inside the glove compartment, there were 3 letters inside the passenger side glove compartment. Each letter was addressed to a different person.

The first letter was addressed to Bobby, the next to Sam and the last to John. Sam's eyes welled up with hot tears when he saw his name written in Dean's hand writing. Sam passed Bobby his letter, while he slowly tore the top of the envelope with his index finger. The letter was scribbled on motel paper.

_Hey Sammy, _

_I really hope you're not reading this, because_ _if you are it means your back in the life and I failed you. I know this goes against my no chick flick moments rule, but bear with me because this will be the last bit of advice I will ever give you. Go back to college, forget about me and live life as you would have without me. I don't know if you will find this letter right after or years from now or find it at all but I hope you never do. I hope you never learn how exactly I die but if you do find out please remember that I am still your brother. Don't get caught up by revenge because we both know where that leads. Sammy I love you but if you don't listen to me and forget about what you have found I will haunt your ass. Goodbye Sammy I love you._

_I'm sorry,_

_- Dean _

Sam just stared at the letter. Bobby had been reading his as well but looked up to see Sam's tear streaked face shadowed by an assortment of emotions. Bobby patted Sam on his back and returned to his own letter reading it again.

_Hey Bobby,_

_I know what you're thinking "you stupid idjit what the hell did you do?" well that's something I can't really explain to you what happened, that's the flaw. But I can tell you that I thought it was the right thing at the time. No matter how pissed you are you have to do 2 last things for me bobby. Don't tell Sam when you figure it out, don't even tell him I'm dead, he really doesn't need to know because I know what he will do if he finds out. Sam will rip apart the world looking for answers, Bobby you can't let him do that. Sam has a future, a chance I never had, we can't let him give that up. The second thing you could do for me is only if he does somehow find out. Keep Sam from turning into me, if he gets reckless, stupid and pissed to the point of bitterness he will become me. I hate myself for this but hide everything from him as best you can. As far as I'm concerned you are my father, or at least more of one than John ever was. I'm sorry, I love you bobby. _

_-Dean _

The last letter sat in between the two men. They both stared at the already torn envelope that showed johns name. "Bobby the bastards already been here"


	6. Chapter 6

It had been about 4 days since Sam and Bobby had found johns open letter. Finding John was surprisingly easy, maybe the grief had made him sloppy, or maybe he didn't care if he was found. Sam and bobby had separated to find the oldest Winchester. Sam had followed the trail all the way to a small town in Wisconsin. There he found John hung over in a crappy motel room.

"Dad?" Sam questioned as he entered the room.

"Dean?" john shot up from the bed and whirled around. He couldn't hide the deep disappointment from his face. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be living it up at college." He said with a sneer.

Sam faced flashed with anger but it vanished as quickly as it came. "You and I both know that you knew I was there with dean when he-…. stop pretending." Sam demanded. This was no time for johns selfish grudges. John looked up at Sam, he was broken, they both were but Sam seemed to be handling it with more grace. "I need to know what your letter said" Sam stated bluntly. John looked up at Sam with a confused stare.

"He did it for me" john's voice broke, he didn't elaborate further.

"He did what for you dad? What did dean do?" Sam couldn't hide the worry in his voice. 'what happened? Was bobby right? it wasn't just a mistake" Sam's thoughts were moving a mile a minute.

"I got in some trouble….after you both left" john stutters a little. "I c- called him to h-help, he came and he got me out but he didn't tell me how then, w-wasn't till he died and I got the... letters that I understand" Sam could see this was hard for john. So held back the burning questions he had. " I owed a demon something, from years ago, he came to collect I- I shouldn't have brought dean into this. I told the demon that if he gave me a lead on the yellow eyed demon, that he could have me after I kill the demon, but I also had to obey a contract…" john paused to keep his emotions in check " if I ever went after him or his demonic family thing he would get me within 2 months of the initial violation. I killed… I killed his daughter thing" the accusing look on Sam's face scared John "I didn't know I swear"

"Demon's don't have children" Sam retorted

"not real children, but the souls they twisted so far in hell that they become demons, they create them" John explained.

"whatever, tell me what the letter said" Sam once again asked bluntly.

"He went to the demon, behind my back, told them that if I could live, they could have him, the demon excepted, he said it was a hard choice but Dean was destined for greater things, things that would destroy demonic standing or something, so he traded with me, he was worth more, that stupid ass playing the hero" John was in a drunken depression, switching his emotions rapidly.

The realization hit Sam like a bus, Dean always was the hero, putting his life last, he had always been like that. 1 last question burned in Sam's mind though "He was killed by a ghost possessed human though, not a demon?"

"It doesn't matter the job was dangerous, his 2 months were up, that's all the demon needed" John once again looked at the youngest Winchester's face, "I already killed him and his weird ass family, the demon I mean, and I went to California and tried to find the ghost and kill that too but it wasn't there"

"yea I know I killed it" Sam muttered staring in shock. "so is this it, is that what happened? Is it over? Dad what am I supposed to do now, without him? We were just starting to be family again, I need him"

"I know Sam, I know" john whispered out of exhaust.

"I don't know what to do with myself, at first it was all about saving Dean, when i couldn't, it was about revenge, but now…. There's nothing left to feel." The last 2 Winchester's stared blankly at each other, examining how much damage dean's death had caused.

All Sam and John could think of was to hunt, kill anything and everything less than human with bad intensions. So they hunted, they didn't know it but dean had unintentionally brought his family back together.

I'm sorry everyone, its not very good, its an awkward end but its all I can think of, sorry I really am my creativity seems to have taken a vacation from this story and wants me to write other ones.


	7. Chapter 7

It had been a few years now, since Deans death, most of it was spent in a drunken hunting rage. Other than that he spent catching up on research he had forgotten over the years. Sam kept thinking about how Dean would react if he could see him now, he could imagine it 'what the hell sam? Seriously get off your ass and suck it up' Dean would have said.

So far he had been dragged to cold oaks, dealt with his abilities and was on his way to hells gates to catch Jake, Jake had escaped only by Sam's mercy, of course he had tried to kill him moments later, but his dad had saved him by selling his soul on the spot. Now on the way to a grave yard, in which the devil's gate was.

The fight broke out, the gate opened and jakes blood was spilled. Yellow eyes approached Sam whispering things in his ear. The gate had opened things were escaping. And the colt was in the somewhere in the grass a few feet out of reach.

Sam was struggling to get off the ground but seemed to be paralyzed by the whispers. A gun shot behind Sam, and yellow eyes flickered a like a light bulb and said "Make sure that what is back is 100% pure Dean" before collapsing onto the grass. Sam's eyes creaked open.

What greeted his eyes was something he thought he would never see again. He was tall, had dirty blond hair, and green eyes. He had the same scars, and same worn leather jacket. It was Dean. Dean held out his hand to Sam. He grasps it and stands, "Heya Sammy" Dean says as he pulls his brother into a strong hug.

"How?" Sam asked into his brothers shoulder.

"The gates open Sammy, I climbed out, thanks for not burning my body." Dean speaks softly.

Ellen and Bobby come over asking and wondering about how the hell he managed it. "How many do you think got out?" Sam asks.

"100 maybe 200 give or take" Ellen says in dismay.

"well I guess we got work to do" Dean says slamming the trunk of his beloved impala.


End file.
